I would Sanjay Anderson Coopers Gupta in a heartbeat.
Reblog if you're a strong black woman who don't...
I think Sheldon has Aspergers.
I don’t usually go in for religious iconography, but the bottom in this fisting porn is wearing the most beautiful Star of David.
I refuse to give a fuck until I am offered one.
I will not be harrumphed at by the dog.
The character wears white jeans so the actor has to have a hot ass. I don’t care if he can hit the notes, his ass must be hot.
Truth is, I'd throw that little fuck under a bus... →
Yesterday I forgot to put the patch on. Now the police are here. I’m almost sure these two things are related.
You want to regulate what a woman does with HER body but not what banks do with OUR economy? you’re dangerous and have probably found Jesus.
Without smoking I’m saving enough money to get laid.
They worked pretty well for me so I think I’m giving out nicotine patches for Halloween this year.
Colbert crushes Limbaugh's "Obama killing... →
I call mine unicep’s because they can’t be biceps if the nicotine patch goes totally around them.
Final home care visit. I asked her if that meant I could have a cigarette. Those people have no sense of humor, and strong right hooks.
12 Great Broadway Moments on Sesame Street →
Awesome. Sutton, Hugh, Idina & Taye„ lillias white, Kristen, Lin-manuel. You get the idea. CLICK IT.
I Just updated my Kindle software without tech support. So I’m an IT guy now right?
If I have to “eat 6 small meals a day”, 3 regular or 10 mini Peppermint patties will count as a meal.
Dr. Heart guy says I can have red wine so I bought a bottle but I only have white wine glasses which sucks because I’m real thirsty.
Let’s assume for a second there is a god. How do I get him to mind his own fucking business and keep his stupid selfish ass out of mine?
This rock is this far away from this rock, the heat of which allows water to remain liquid and shit to grow. That’s my version of atheism.
What the Republicans are doing the gays call cruising. Check out everyone at the bar and hope that at 4am, you’re not left with the troll.
Sucking on a candy doesn’t help the urge to smoke, but sucking on an Andy might.
The home care nurse says I’m alive. I feel like I have to believe her because she has a degree.
Since I’ve been forced to stop, my pot dealer can’t afford his text books.
The "Not Lazy, Never Gonna Be Rich"
That’s who most of us are. Regular people who go to work every fucking day for asshole bosses and the soul sucking public just to stay rich enough to not starve. I take offense to the idea that if you’re not wealthy it’s because you’re lazy. Not working hard enough. The truth is, the largest portion of Americans work without the chance or expectation that our job is...
After telling me how improved I was they sent me... →
I still want to smoke bad enough to punch a kitten but I know that would be pointless. Now I’m looking to smoke a kitten.